Brad Pitt and Shia LaBeouf have gone on a camping trip. Brad and Shia like camping. They like to scare each other with ghost stories and go on bear hunts and roast marshmallows in the fire. They like to snuggle down in their two-man tent and eat rehydrated pasta out of foil-wrapped packaging. Sometimes, when Shia gets scared by the crackle and rustle of the forest, Brad lets him share his sleeping bag.
Brad and Shia don't think about washing for three days. Brad and Shia do manly things together, like wearing plaid shirts and picking their teeth with a Swiss army knife. Brad and Shia speak deep into the night about the futility of life and tell each other tales of the old country. Brad and Shia befriend squirrels and gain their trust. Brad and Shia dig holes to do their business in.
Brad and Shia like to say 'bivouac' a lot. Brad and Shia learn to whittle. Brad and Shia listen to music on Shia's iPod, using an earbud each. Brad and Shia forget about the rest of the world and forge a bond so strong not even Angelina Jolie can break it with her temptress eyes.
Brad and Shia hear something in the night. It's Nazis! Nazis everywhere! Not real Nazis, you understand, but a practical joke played on them by the production team of their new movie, Fury. Brad and Shia are on the phone to their agents. Brad is weeping, Shia is trying to stay strong. Brad and Shia are Not Happy that everyone is laughing at them for being scared of a few fake Nazis. Brad and Shia are Not Happy at all.
Brad and Shia want to return to the simple life. But Brad and Shia have to go home now. Brad and Shia share a look. It is a look full of pride and fire and mutual respect. The wind whispers through the trees, and it whispers "Brad and Shia…"
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