Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines is the UK’s most downloaded track of all time and come ON everybody sort yourselves OUT

Popstar Robin Thicke has taken time out from his busy schedule of rubbing aftershave samples from the pages of men’s magazine furiously onto his own neck to celebrate the fact that his song Blurred Lines has become the most downloaded song in UK chart history.

Fervent sunglasses-indoors-wearer Robin – who teamed up with T.I. and Pharrell Williams for the song in May last year – claimed top spot in the All-Time Official Download Chart Top 100 yesterday after selling 1.54 million copies in 11 months since its release.

Anyway he was given an award yesterday to mark the terrible occasion and said some words about how pleased he was that 1.54 million people had contributed to his ‘buying novelty condoms out of them machines in pub bathrooms’ fund by purchasing his song.

“I'm so honoured,” he quoted Marvin Gaye as saying. “The success of Blurred Lines is a dream come true."



Official Charts Company chief, your boy Martin Talbot, added: “Blurred Lines is surely one of the catchiest pop hits of all time, so its success is no great surprise.

"But to become one of only two tracks to have been downloaded 1.5m times and climb to the top of the poll as the biggest download of all time is an incredible achievement."

Adele’s Someone Like You follows in second place in the charts, while Moves Like Jagger is third. That Gotye one who did Somebody That I Used To Know came fourth. Unreal.

Anyway we’ve just checked and Robin Thicke has actually done three entire songs since Blurred Lines but you can’t name a single one of them, can you? The year is 2044. Robin Thicke is gyrating his ancient pelvis around a microphone. “I know you want it,” he whispers. He is cursed forever to sing Blurred Lines under bright lights on TV. His marriage has turned to dust. The balloons that say how big his junk is have long since deflated. “Kill me,” he screams. “LET ME DIE.” No, Robin Thicke. You may not die.